When life is hard and beautiful at the same time

blog today

The early hours are crisp and I order hot coffee instead of iced. Reese says “see,” wanting her car window rolled down. The crisp leaves cover our budding grass. A dear sister is states away, I feel the distance.
A new community is our family, I can taste authenticity. A friend delivers a perfect baby who has no breath, tears and questions are ever-present as they hold their lifeless boy.

I watch tiny legs race across the weeds, Minnie held tight. I wake up and crave nourishment for my soul.
I search for inspiration in the drizzle of syrup on waffle stacks. My tired hands find a song to pour over the morning light. I close my eyes behind my glasses.

And I will call upon Your name
And keep my eyes above the waves
When oceans rise
My soul will rest in Your embrace
For I am Yours and You are mine

Your grace abounds in deepest waters
Your sovereign hand
Will be my guide
Where feet may fail and fear surrounds me
You’ve never failed and You won’t start now

Comfort of a soft, sinking pillow after a long day. His love, His grace. Reese smooches me through the car window, lips pressed shamelessly on the glass.

His love guides, it’s availability being endless. So, I walk in love. Through waves, hand in hand with my creator. Whatever may come and whatever lies before me.

Breathe deep, slow breaths. Soak in this moment, you are loved. The one who designed you, adores you.

See the beauty. Celebrate the moments. He never fails. Hold your loved ones tightly. Rejoice with others, cry with them too. When the chair by Mimi will be filled with someone other than Papa this Thanksgiving; when dear friends face a quiet house instead of a new baby cry. When Reese asks for 19 smooches before she goes to sleep. Cling to Him.

He is good. He is love. When it doesn’t make sense, rest in his embrace.