Early Morning Lies

I sit in restlessness as my body is making a basketball sized human and I can’t quite get comfortable on either side of my sore body.

I have been falling in love with my life. Watching my sweet girl grow and feeling baby #2 kick hard; two of the most joyful experiences yet, and they are happening now. These days filled with potty training and paint-messes, tons of laughter and working through beloved age two-tantrums. Friends stopping by with heavy hearts. Gaining weight and too tired to exersise. I notice the lies enter in the wee morning hours, you are alone…this baby will be hard, it might even break you..you will never get your body back, fears roam my mind, intending to take root. These vagabond thoughts cannot take residence. Clearing my thoughts, I ponder simple truth, I fight back. I have a community around me that supports, encourages and loves me. I am known, I am loved, I am enough. That no matter what happens with this sweet baby, God is good and He is love; speaking truth loudly into my life.

That sometimes God does give more than we can handle, and asking for help is not weakness. That the striving days have gone and the thriving is here to stay.

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I read the end of June on my calendar and barely process the unfolding of these warm Summer months. Holding tightly to each moment, I take a deep breathe of gratitude. So much has been given to me this day, even if nothing else is given again, I have all I need. I listen to a sermon in the car and hear, serve by choice. As I tie her shoes and fold his clothes, I chose to smile and chose to love, because that is truth.

1 Peter 4:8-10 Above all, love each other deeply, because love covers over a multitude of sins. Offer hospitality to one another without grumbling. Each of you should use whatever gift you have received to serve others, as faithful stewards of God’s grace in its various forms. If anyone speaks, they should do so as one who speaks the very words of God. If anyone serves, they should do so with the strength God provides, so that in all things God may be praised through Jesus Christ. To him be the glory and the power for ever and ever. Amen.

Love deeply and serve. I can only do so with His strength. (can I get an amen?!)

I hope this Monday, you know you are loved deeply and that you are enough.